i curse the day you were born

Contrary to what the crack taking writers of People and Us Magazine believe - the Sex and the City movie was incredible.  There were all the cinematic chick flick requirements.  Weddings, gays, Manolo Blahniks, love emails, crude yet appropriate female humor - just a cornucopia of female awesomeness really. 

HOWEVA, our theatric experience was amplified million fold by an element completely out of HBO's capable hands.  And that my friend was the Unidentified Lip Gloss Applying Boys who sat in front of us.  Make whatever insinuations about their preferences that you wish, but we're politically correct here at fogbogalert so we'll refrain. 

But we will not - CANNOT - refrain from bestowing upon you this rarest of rare dialogues exchanged between the aforementioned gentlemen. 

Fabulous #1: How many guys are in here, actually? Like for reals? 

Fabulous #2 (after making a grand gesturing of tallying the guys): I count 5. 

Fabulous #1: Honey, you can't count us I own curlers and a straightener. 

Now maybe this isn't funny to you or even mentionable.  But land o'goshen was it funny to us.  Perhaps this stems from mere incredulity.  Who knew that amidst the fratttattatty boys roaming the strip that there were these types of guys in Tuscaloosa.  As Kate just pointed out, one of them appeared to have collagen injections in his lips. And a mustache!  And less we also forget that one of them appeared to know verbatim the lyrics to "The Trolly Song" from Meet Me in St. Louis.  As Judy Garland belted out "Clang, clang, clang went the trolly" this boy joined her word for word in in the resounding "Ding, ding, ding went the bell." 

It should be noted though that mere flamboyancy does not excuse answering your phone during a critical point of relationship resolution.  

we love NY, 

yates, kates and sarah   

I am a creature of the night.

Yesterday Sarah and I found ourselves sitting at the end of a long table of ATOs and rushees. The scene: Pepito's. The mood: awkward. We had been lured to the rushee dinner with the promise of Newk's, and when the reality of Pepito's mediocre Mexican food was set before us, both of our evenings got a little bit worse. We both ordered the quesadilla from the grill (the only acceptable item on the menu) and waited for Armageddon. We weren't disappointed.

The food was nasty, and my risky choice of a mandarin Mexican soft drink didn't compliment the pungent bouquet of grease and foul chicken. Sarah shared my sentiments, which she vocalized at an unfortunate moment as the waiter was refilling her drink. She failed to notice him as she said,

"I feel that I've gotten this before here and it was much, much better than it is now..."

I gave her a look and the ice tinkling in her glass alerted her to the waiter's presence. Sarah looked at him and attempted a very disastrous recovery.

She glanced at the waiter and said, "...I mean...(longest pause ever)...yum."

It was obvious, it was awkward, and all could have been salvaged had she not enunciated the "Yum" so very much. "Yeeuhmm," was more like it. I nearly choked.

sex and the city premieres TONIGHT!

so hill and i go to watch bama play in the sec baseball tournament and there is a six year old little girl dressed in a cheerleading outfit who attaches herself to us. you can ask dan because he was there for the majority of the game and also experienced the terror of an entire nine innings spent with allie, that being the miniature cheerleader's name.  anyway, time passes and finally she asked me what my name was and i told her, and then she asked for hill's.  when i told her hill's name she was extremely confused so i attempted to explain that his name actually was hill, i.e. a mound of dirt kind of like a mini mountain.  she seemed slightly less perplexed and pretended to understand so we moved on.

flashforward (that's probably two words but i like it better as one) to a couple innings later when i ask allie if she remembers our names...

allie:  "yours is....(lots of intense thinking)....kate?"

kate:  "yes! now what about his" (pointing at hill)

allie:  (even more thinking but then i see the light bulb go off)"....MOUNTAIN!"

i laughed for five minutes.

from now on hill's new name is mountain.

spread the word.

that's all for now. sorry its been so long but i'm back in tuscaloosa so postage should hopefully increase

----kate

p.s.  everyone go see satc, there's bound to be blogging about it

back seat, windows up

So ok, I've gotten wind that the masses of adoring fans - and by this I mean Graham Gillespie - who stalk our blog are getting restless.   And dearest cherubic readers, do not think it is by choice that we are negligent of you.  It's just that nobody is around anybody else to quote them. 

HOWEVER, I did think the following quote from The Office was so funny I laughed until I began to violently hiccup. Then I got afraid I was going to die like Meredith Grey's step mom. And also, I am not Lexi Grey. 

But I digress, here's the quote: 

Andy: Hey, what are we doing? What's the game? I want in.

Jim: Oh, there's no game. We're just trying to get these chips for Karen.

Andy: Did you check the vending machine? 

Karen: Oh, the vending machines! How did we miss that? 

Jim: I have no idea. We went right for the copier.

Karen: Mmhm. 

Jim: And then we checked the fax machine. 

Karen: Yeah, nothing there. 

Andy (defiantly): Did you check your...butt?

Bahahaha. 

because Jim, Andy and Karen are my friends, 

sy

I'm living in Etna, CA...where the heck is that?

Just some updates from the Ranch for those who are interested...


Maury Carlisle hit a guy in the back with a rock while he was going to the bathroom in the woods and the guy peed all over himself...Maury later hit his head on a light fixture in the dining room.


I catch JT dancing by himself to music all the time (and I mean embarrassing dancing) so I have now decided to dance like a loser too. I also convinced a girl that JT and I make out a lot (which is clearly false). The poor girl was asking too many questions so I just started messing with her because I am a bia.

Some new phrases that I have heard out here, laughed hysterically at, and think our friends should adopt...
"I'm not enjoying you at all right now."- Ginger Anne Woodruff (and oddly enough, she knows Robby. Because I don't think there is a woman on this earth that Robby doesn't know)
"I'm as lost as an Easter egg." -Bruce Johnston (owner of JH Ranch)
And in a creepy, seductive voice, "Hey Hey." -Karis (who is engaged- I just love saying this to people. I may start doing this instead of grabbing everyone's butt, but I'm not sure yet).

Also, while I was chatting on my cellular phone with Charlie the other day, he told me to turn around....
"Why don't you come visit me in Etna?" -Me
"I am. Turn around."- Charlie
"Did you turn around?"-Charlie
"Yeah and you lied. You weren't there." -Me
"Long distance flinch."-Charlie

And we went bowling in Yreka last night. Yep that's right, a town called Yreka. We rented out the bowling alley and played Christian music the whole time. I love JH. Oh, and I made a guy spew his Mountain Dew all over the table yesterday. Apparently, I am the funniest person ever.

Well that's all folks. JT, Riley, and I are loving the Ranch (even though Riley is on maintenance and he is terrible at it) and I miss you guys like CRAZY! Love you. Write letters. Address is on facebook. -KMac

Some guy in Panama City pooped his pants.

I haven't seen my peeps in a while. Until then...

"A quote!!"

ttfn.
yates.

y'all don't wanna hear me, you just wanna dance

Now, I'm not against the slight fabrication of a novel in order to make it more applicable to the big screen.  I understand that verbatim transfer from novel to screen play is impossible.  That said, I did enjoy The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Capsian. As a Disney action adventure film.  However, as an adaptation of CS Lewis's second (technically third) installment of the Narnia series it it made me want to systematically send anthrax laden hate mail to anyone remotely involved with the project.  Normally I am completely averse to spoiling the endings of things for people (except for that one time when I ruined the end of The Sopranos for CJ which was a complete and total accident as I do not watch the show and mentioned it in passing because I had seen a segment about in on "The Soup"), however in this particular gem of a quote it is unavoidable. SO read at your own risk. 

Me: I mean there was absolutely no sexual tension and/or kissing between Caspian and Susan in the book!

Vince Andrews: Yeah I was just waiting for them to do it the whole time. 

In hindsight this is probably one of the funniest things I've ever heard.  Because clearly, and I feel Vince would agree with me, he was not waiting for them to do it.   This is a movie based around the concept of four adolescent British children being relocated to a mystical land in which the hero is a lion.  At no point is anyone "doing it." It was just one of those things you say to continue conversation. Everyone does it. 

vivé Aslan!

sy